Nurturing emotional and spiritual intimacy in your marriage is more than a legal commitment or a shared household, it’s a covenant designed by God to be a source of love, growth, and spiritual partnership. While physical attraction and shared responsibilities are important, lasting joy in marriage comes from a deeper bond, one that blends emotional closeness with spiritual unity.
Nurturing emotional and spiritual intimacy in your marriage requires intentional effort, consistent communication, and a shared commitment to grow together in faith. When couples invest in these areas, they experience a connection that not only weathers challenges but thrives in them.
Why Emotional and Spiritual Intimacy Matters
A strong marriage is built on more than just romance; it thrives when both partners feel deeply connected in heart and spirit. Emotional intimacy allows you to feel understood, accepted, and loved for who you are. Spiritual intimacy aligns your hearts with God’s purpose, guiding your relationship through His Word and prayer.
When you intentionally nurture both, you:
- Build trust that withstands conflict
- Foster open and honest communication
- Create a safe space for vulnerability
- Strengthen your shared faith foundation
These qualities form the glue that holds a marriage together long after the honeymoon stage has passed.
Prioritize Quality Time Together
In the business of life, work, children, and responsibilities, it’s easy for meaningful connection to take a back seat. But emotional intimacy flourishes when you spend intentional, distraction-free time together.
Practical Ideas:
- Schedule weekly date nights (even if it’s at home with takeout and candlelight)
- Take evening walks to talk and decompress
- Start a shared hobby or interest
- End each day with a 15-minute check-in about your highs and lows
When you regularly set aside time for each other, you send the message: You matter to me. Our connection matters to me.
Helpful Resource:
📖 Our Moments Couples Edition Conversation Cards – A fun and easy way to spark meaningful conversations and learn more about each other.
Communicate With Honesty and Compassion
Deep emotional intimacy is rooted in open communication. It’s not just about discussing schedules or surface topics, it’s about expressing feelings, fears, dreams, and needs without judgment.
Tips for Better Communication:
- Practice active listening without interrupting
- Use “I” statements instead of accusations
- Validate each other’s feelings, even if you see things differently
- Avoid bottling frustrations; address them calmly and early
Remember, how you speak to each other matters just as much as what you say. Kindness in tone and approach strengthens emotional trust.
Helpful Resource:
📚 The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman – A marriage classic that helps you understand and speak your spouse’s love language for better connection.
Pray Together Daily
One of the most powerful ways to nurture spiritual intimacy in your marriage is to pray together. Prayer invites God into your relationship and keeps your focus on His guidance.
Benefits of Praying Together:
- Builds a sense of unity and shared purpose
- Encourages vulnerability before God and each other
- Creates a habit of turning to God during both joys and trials
Start small if this feels new, perhaps a short prayer before bed or in the morning. Over time, prayer will become a natural and treasured rhythm in your marriage.
Helpful Resource:
📖 The Power of a Praying® Couple by Stormie Omartian – A guide to praying together intentionally and effectively.
Study God’s Word as a Couple
Reading and applying Scripture together keeps your marriage anchored in truth. This shared practice opens opportunities to discuss faith, life decisions, and God’s vision for your relationship.
Ideas for Studying Together:
- Join a couples’ Bible study group
- Read a devotional specifically for married couples
- Choose a Bible reading plan on topics like love, forgiveness, or unity
- Share your personal takeaways from the day’s Scripture
When you grow together in God’s Word, you’re not just gaining knowledge, you’re building a spiritual legacy.
Helpful Resource:
📖 The One Year Love Language Minute Devotional – Daily devotionals designed to strengthen your relationship through God’s Word.
Serve Together
Serving others as a couple deepens both emotional and spiritual connection. Whether it’s volunteering at church, helping a neighbor, or supporting a charity, acts of service draw you closer by aligning your hearts toward a common mission.
Serving together:
- Strengthens teamwork and cooperation
- Shifts your focus from self to others
- Models Christ’s love to those around you
Even small acts, like preparing a meal for someone in need, can bring a profound sense of shared purpose.
Practice Forgiveness and Grace
Every marriage will face moments of misunderstanding and hurt. The key to lasting intimacy is learning to forgive quickly and extend grace generously.
How to Foster a Forgiving Spirit:
- Remember that you, too, need forgiveness
- Pray for the strength to let go of resentment
- Focus on reconciliation, not winning an argument
- Create a safe space where mistakes are acknowledged and learned from
Forgiveness not only restores emotional closeness but also reflects the heart of Christ in your marriage.
Helpful Resource:
📚 Love & Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs – Explores the biblical principle of unconditional love and respect that can transform relationships.
Support Each Other’s Spiritual Growth
Spiritual intimacy doesn’t mean you’re always at the same place in your faith journey, but it does mean encouraging each other to grow. Celebrate each other’s progress, offer gentle accountability, and be a source of encouragement.
You can:
- Recommend faith-building books or podcasts
- Celebrate spiritual milestones, like baptism anniversaries
- Respect and encourage personal time with God
Your role is to inspire, not pressure your spouse toward deeper faith.
Helpful Resource:
📖 A Couple’s Guide to a Growing Marriage – Practical ways to deepen both your faith and relationship.
Express Affection Regularly
Small, consistent gestures of love go a long way in keeping emotional intimacy alive. Affection is not just physical touch, it’s verbal affirmation, thoughtful actions, and emotional support.
Simple Ways to Show Affection:
- Compliment each other daily
- Hold hands during walks or prayer
- Write love notes and leave them in unexpected places
- Celebrate small wins and milestones together
Affection keeps the heart connection vibrant and reassures your spouse of your love.
Helpful Resource:
🖊️ Knock Knock What I Love About You Fill-in-the-Blank Journal – A sweet way to remind your spouse how much you appreciate them.
Create Shared Spiritual Traditions
Traditions become treasured memories and help solidify your marriage’s spiritual identity. They give you something to look forward to and anchor your relationship in meaningful practices.
Examples:
- Lighting Advent candles together during Christmas
- Fasting together at the start of the year
- Celebrating your wedding anniversary with prayer and Scripture reflection
- Choosing a “word of the year” or a marriage theme verse
These rhythms help weave your love story into God’s greater story.
Helpful Resource:
📖 Moments Together for Couples – 365 daily devotions to help you create lasting spiritual habits.
Final Thoughts
Nurturing emotional and spiritual intimacy in your marriage isn’t a one-time project, it’s a lifelong journey. It requires consistent effort, intentional habits, and a shared commitment to keep God at the center. As you grow closer emotionally and spiritually, you’ll find that challenges become easier to face, joy becomes deeper, and your love becomes a powerful reflection of Christ’s covenant with His church.
Marriage is not just about living together, it’s about walking together in faith, love, and unity. When you invest in both emotional and spiritual closeness, you’re building a marriage that lasts, not just for a lifetime, but for eternity.
Read more on Blissfully Wedded: https://blissfullywedded.com